So I have now hit 6 months out. This morning, i weighed in at 279 pounds, which is 99 pounds from my top weight on Aug 1st. In my eyes, the changes on the tape measure are more substancial than that... here are those numbers.

 2012 has started off with a BANG! Sorry it has been so long since I last blogged.. I have been busy living this new exciting life that has emerged. I feel like a Phoenix or better yet as my boyfriend likes to refer to me… a Butterfly.

Well, its been just a little over 5 months since i took back control of my life. What a 5 months it has been! While i am yet nowhere near a healthy weight yet, it is amazing how much of a marginalized life i was living. I found that for years, i kinda trimmed the edges off of life, and missed so much! I am able to do so much more now, and cannot wait to see what happens when i have my hands wrapped around this whole health thing. I CANNOT WAIT for this spring. Opening day, i will be at Kings Dominion Theme park. I LOVE ROLLER COASTERS, and i have not been able to fit on one since 2003.

So, one of the more frustrating things that I have experienced through this process is stalls! Where one month, you are dropping 5+ pounds a week, and all of a sudden, it turns off like someone flipped a light switch.... It never fails that no matter how many times it happens, and how many times you bust through, when it happens... you feel like it is the end of the world, and you will never lose another pound.

So my first Thanksgiving was not as bad as i had built it up to be in my head. Things are never the same when you can’t overindulge as you had for the last 30 years, but different did not necessarily mean bad... just different. The day became less about stuffing myself, and more about reflection on the last year, and being truly thankful for life and an overwhelming amount of blessings. While I HATE not being able to be with family during the holidays, it was nice to spend the day with good friends. I have really been blessed with lots of those... 

I guess the first thing to do here, would be to introduce myself. My name is Ed Merkel, I am 30 and live in Roanoke Rapids, NC.  I have been married almost 4 years to Sarah.  I am originally from Carlsbad, NM. I found my way to the East coast through my job as a Youth Pastor at First Christian Church, which we have been at for 3 years now.  I am a Dallas Cowboys fanatic, and adore being outside hunting, fishing, or hiking..

My, my ... how time does FLY when you are having FUN! It is hard to believe that just one year ago today I was having my gastric by-pass.

When I began this journey, I was aware that I was an emotional eater. It was my hope that bariatric surgery would prove to be the tool that would help physically stop me long enough for a spiritual solution to take hold and move me to a higher ground. This month that hope became a reality. I believe I am now ready to lay out in detail the events that lead to my NEED to emotionally eat and the victory that I am now experiencing as a result of not being able to physically do so.

My last three months have been filled with varying emotions ranging from overwhelming excitement to utter discouragement, but the one thing that has remained constant is my determination to succeed at losing ALL this excess weight! No matter how long it takes!  Being a life-long dieter, there are a few “truths” I have experienced along the way. One is the last few pounds are ALWAYS the hardest to lose. Another is the number on the scale is NOT always a good indicator of success.

How I stay motivated when...I am physically sick and don't feel like working out; when I step on the scales and the number is the same as the two weeks before;  when I am having a "fat day". Until now I have blogged about all the COOL exciting stuff going on in my life. I figured it was time to let you in on a little secret - Sometimes it is VERY difficult to stay on the path and stay motivated.