So my first Thanksgiving was not as bad as i had built it up to be in my head. Things are never the same when you can’t overindulge as you had for the last 30 years, but different did not necessarily mean bad... just different. The day became less about stuffing myself, and more about reflection on the last year, and being truly thankful for life and an overwhelming amount of blessings. While I HATE not being able to be with family during the holidays, it was nice to spend the day with good friends. I have really been blessed with lots of those...
So on Monday, i decided that i was going to clean out my closet and dresser, and get all of my clothes together that no longer fit and donate them. This was the result
Now, this picture is a little deceiving, as it was taken on my phone, but that pile is 10 feel long, and about 3 feet high.... 6 BIG TRASH BAGS FULL!!!!
One quick note here, as i said in my last post, i am a youth pastor. My faith is a big part of who i am, and i will integrate parts of that into this blog. I promise not to get preachy, but i will from time to time talk about the bible, my faith, and how it plays into my transformation
As i was going through these clothes, my mind went to Ephesians 4:22-24 where the writer says:
You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.
And I started to think about how I have to get rid of these clothes that are no longer any good for me, so that I can make room for new ones.... What if we translate that to making changes into our lives, in this case my health and weight... I know that it is REALLY HARD! It is nearly impossible to just make changes by starting a new workout routine, or a stringent to diet. I fought the fight most of my life, but It seemed to never work! Why did it never work? What was my problem? Why couldn’t I do it….why, for so many years did i resolve to make changes in my life, but didn’t? Why? Why was it so hard just to automatically be something new…to be better?
I wonder if in the light of that text, if its because for so many years, i never tried to take anything off.... I always just tried to just bolt on something new….a new habit, workout, diet, a new way of being, a new something that I planned to start every Monday morning, and failed miserably
Did the failure come because i was failing to address the issue, "take off the old"? I mean who would have thought the old in my case happened to be like 75% of my stomach, but in a real sense it is true. I took off a piece of me that was trapped and addicted so that I may be made new, and I am loving the change and transformation. The road is hard, but I am finding that new habits are sticking a little better because i took care of the junk that holding me back.
How do you go about putting on a new self and putting off an old one? How do you go about becoming new?
Weight at start of Pre-Op Diet: 378
Weight at surgery (8/18): 358
Today's Weight: 294
Total loss so far: 84
to goal of 200: 94
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